quarta-feira, 27 de agosto de 2008

I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all

Será que é melhor sofrer ou não sentir nada?
Nunca deixei de sentir,mas sempre tive medo de não sentir. Sempre achei que os que não sentiam acabavam no suicídio, tanto social quanto físico. Inclusive, sentir é muito do viver, é a cor do dia-a-dia. Não importa se é uma cor escura ou clara, sentir diz o sabor, a cor, a luz ou sombra, cheiros. Tudo fica diferente de acordo com como estamos nos sentindo.
A ausência das sensações pode causar uma não vida. A partir do momento que não se sente, não existe mais a emoção da mudança, portanto tudo permanece na inercia de quando sentíamos alguma coisa. È, também, quando não precisamos de mais nada, nos bastamos, não sentimos falta, saudade, carência. Simplesmente somos, já que estamos.
Quando num estado de não sentir será possível voltar? Sendo possível, como isso acontece?
Acredito que o voltar a sentir tem que vir de dentro para fora, sendo impossível simplesmente fazer alguém sentir de novo, ate porque ela não sente, portanto não liga pra o que você faz, ou tenta causar nela. Como um movimento de dentro para fora deve ser iniciado por algum tipo de memoria, ou vontade, algo que remeta sentimentos e sensações, isso já é um sentir, é um desenvolvimento sensorial sutil, porem sensorial, portanto, já seria o voltar a sentir. Concluo ser um movimento de dentro para fora, incontrolável, imprevisível, podendo nunca acontecer.
Fico com a dor que me mantém quente e vivendo, e se conseguir me manter integra, posso "controlar". Ela já me é familiar, e, apesar de não ser sempre agradável, sensorialmente demonstra a capacidade de intensidade e força dentro de mim.
Sou forte!

still hopping


For You I Will (Confidence)
Teddy Geiger


Composição: Indisponível


Alright yeah.. yeah..

Wondering the streets and a world underneath it all

But nothing seems to be

Nothing tastes as sweet as what I can't have

Like you and the way that youÂ’re twisting your hair round your finger

But tonight I'm not afraid to tell you

What I feel about you

oh, I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have

And cannon ball into the water

I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have

For you I will

For you I will

Forgive me if I still stutter

From all of the clutter in my head

Cause I could fall asleep in those eyes

Like a waterbed

Do I seem familiar

I've crossed you in hallways a thousand times

No more camouflage

I want to be exposed

And not be afraid to fall

Oh, I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have

And cannon ball into the water

I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have

For you I will

You always want what you can't have

But I've got to try

I'll muster every ounce of confidence I have

For you I will,

For you I will,

For you I will

If I could dim the lights in the mall

And create a mood, I would

Shout out your name so it echoes in every room I would

That's what I'd do

That's what I'd do

That's what I'd do

To get through to you yeah

I'll muster every ounce of confidence I have

And cannon ball into the water

I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have

For you I will

You always want what you can't have

But I've got to try

I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence

I have

For you I will,

For you I will,

For you I will,

For you I will

Once is enough to make me attack

Some day i'll understand the reality of my living
And from that day on
me and myself
can hold hands
walk alike
Now
the only reality i know is this

Money rules my life
Need rules my money
Instinct rules my need
emotions rules my instinct
what rules my emotion?

I'm in constant numbness
in another hand
I feel with a full heart
I scream with full lungs

burning
I'm burning
with the freezing coldness of my rational thinking
there is no healing for 3º degree burns
can you see me?

this is me NOW


Tears Dry On Their Own
Amy Winehouse


Composição: Amy Winehouse / Nickolas Ashford / Valerie Simpson

All I can ever be to you,

is a darkness that we knew

And this regret

I got accustomed to

Once it was so right

When we were at our high,

Waiting for you in the hotel at night

I knew

I hadn´t met my match

But every moment we could snatch

I don't know why

I got so attached

It's my responsibility,and

You don't owe nothing to me

But to walk away I have no capacity

He walks away

the sun goes down,

He takes the day but

I'm grown

And in your grey

In this blue shade

My tears dry on their own.

I don't understand

Why do I stress a man,

When there's so many better things at hand

We could have never had it all

We had to hit a wall

So this is inevitable with

drawleven if

I stopped wating you,

A perspective pushes through

I'll be some next man's other woman soon

Ah can I play myself again?

Or should I just be my own best friend?

Not fuck myself in the head with stupid men

He walks away

the sun goes down,

He takes the day but

I'm grown

And in your grey

In this blue shade

My tears dry on their own.

So we are history,

Your shadow covers me

The skies above a blaze

He walks away

the sun goes down,

He takes the day but

I'm grown

And in your grey

In this blue shade

My tears dry on their own.

I wish

I could say no regrets

And no emotional debts'

Cause as we kissed goodbye the sun sets

So we are history

The shadow covers me

The sky above a blaze

that only lovers see

He walks away

the sun goes down,

He takes the day but

I'm grown

And in your grey

My blue shade

My tears dry on their own.

(whoa)He walks away

the sun goes down,

He takes the day but

I'm grown

And in your grey

My deep shade

My tears dry on their own

He walks away

the sun goes down,

He takes the day but

I'm grown

And in your grey

My deep shade

My tears dry